No I haven't take up illegal substances.
This morning I was was swimming at Steiner, when I was breathing to the right and noticed that the dude in the lane right next to me, had a major wardrobe malfunction on the back of his jammer. It wasn't just a tiny hole. He had a rip from the very bottom of his jammer up along the very back of his jammer to the top. His full crack was exposed. He was doing some serious laps and doing flip turn after flip turn. I was considering stopping him in the middle of the lane to let him know, but figured he'd discover it on his own soon enough.
I often stopped at the end of the lane to see if he would stop too so I could fill him in, but he didn't stop and kept on going. I was getting more and more embarrassed for the man. But finally after about 1000 M, he stopped, and I timed it right before he got into his next set. I said, "Hey, I'm not sure if you know or not, but you have a hole in your suit, in the back." He smiled awkwardly and did and finger check. That smile faded quickly and he did a backwards entry out on to the deck and I felt it polite for me not to watch his exit out of the pool area. I continued my own workout:
1000 free strong
1000 large paddles
1000 freestyler paddles
1000 no finger paddles
1000 free no equipment strong
5,500 meters (6000 yards) in 1:50